Bush Multiple Choice Test II
Not content to rewrite history, the Bush Administration is busy devising tests that will be used by future school children to test their knowledge of American history fifty years from now, when George W. Bush is universally recognized as one of the greatest presidents ever!
1). Which military figure was vindicated by history?
a) Reichmarshall Herman Goring: He boasted that although WWII had ended badly for the Nazis, Germany would build him a monument within thirty years time.
b) General Armstrong Custer: He vastly misunderstimated Sitting Bull and Crazy Horse when he urged them to ‘bring it on.’ But the numerous Hollywood depictions of his courageous death lead many historians to hail him as a pioneer of the so-called “surge.”
c) George W. Bush: The public re-evaluates Bush, but only after an aging Tom Cruise plays the former president in the straight to video movie “Top Gun IV: Mission Accomplished.”
d) None of the above
2). In retrospect it’s pretty fortunate that “Scooter” Libby avoided jail time in a federal pen because:
a). Dick Cheney and George Bush admitted to putting “Scooter” Libby up to lying after the next president, Hillary Clinton personally dunked the duo.
b). Pulitzer prizewinning journalist Matt Drudge uncovers ironclad evidence that Saddam Hussein had in fact bid on a Nigerian uranium mine offered on e-bay, but was outbid at the last second by American counter terrorism officials working out of the vice-president’s office. Ambassador Joe Wilson’s Op-Ed in the NYT almost exposed the super-secret Cheney/Rumsfeld operation, which used the online auction site to snag would be terrorists bidding on everything from Pez dispensers to fissile material.
c). Dick Cheney’s secret plan to “liberate Libby” using Special Forces, had he been forced to implement the operation, might have been the straw that broke the camel’s back, particularly since the shotgun wielding VP was preparing to lead the assault himself.
3). Bush’s top-secret nickname for his friend Vladimir Putin was:
a) Mr. Soul
b) Count Vladymre
c) Poison Lips
Friday, July 06, 2007
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